You were in love, she wasn’t. The relationship ended, and the pain set in. That’s fine. It’s natural but as time goes by, you realize that what she really took was not that one jacket you’ll never get back, or months or years of your life and love – she took your confidence and your ability to know yourself. As time heals all wounds, you may start to wonder if you’re over her or not. These are five signs that you could be ready to move on.
1. You’re Not Fantasizing About Screwing Every Woman You Meet
Monogamy is tough. Sure, you might sneak a peek at a hot waitress, but you have to be careful of staring too long when you’re dating someone. But as soon as that relationship is over, all you want to do is screw every woman you meet. Someone who seems like good girlfriend material is suddenly viewed through a lens of raw lust. It’s a phase. When you come out of it, you start seeing women with that more familiar mix of lust and appreciation; feelings return. You’ve turned the corner. Welcome back.
2. Things Don’t Autocorrect To Her Name Anymore
It can take a phone or computer months to get the auto fill and autocorrect out of its system. If you can finally type “Em” without it completing to “Emily,” then you’ve gone months without talking about her and having her constantly on your mind.
3. You’re Not Freaked Out When She Dates Someone Else
If you hear that your ex is dating someone and your first reaction is a long rant about how he’s now “trapped,” and “God help him,” then you’re not over her. Anger is one of the stages. Wait it out some more.
4. Things That Made You Happy When You Were With Her Make You Happy Again
If you and your ex went for a bike ride every Sunday and then ate ice cream, it’s reasonable that bikes and cool, frozen treats would be sore subjects for a while. But if you’re suddenly hit with a craving for a sweet treat and you grab it without a second thought, or a pedal around town is bringing a smile to your lips, congrats: you’re building new memories in which she’s not there.
5. You Feel Stagnant
Wallowing in self-pity is fun for a while, but sooner or later you get the feeling that you need to move on. If you feel like nothing’s going to get better until you pull yourself up by the bootstraps, than congrats: you’re ready to move on.
Some of these stages will take more time than others, but if you have got at least three of these five, than you’re over her and can start living a life again. Hit the clubs, meet some mutual friends and start on the dating scene again. Meet someone new and try again. The worst is over.